To Write or not to Write that is the question

Well plain and simple I need to get back onto the diet/healthy living train once again.  It's been a dismal 3 weeks.  Haven't eaten properly at all.  Haven't journaled.  Not much exercise.  Nothing.  And of course if I don't do anything then nothing will get accomplished.  I truly suck at the journalling part.  Takes a great effort to write my little story.  It does keep you accountable.  It does make you go uggg why did I really eat that?  It does make you have to pause and truly think about what you are eating and why you are eating it along with all the emotions that go along with it.  So why am I not journalling?  Plain and simple because I actually have to face what I am doing to my body.  Good bad or ugly I have to look at it and admit that my bad habits are still consuming me and they need to go away.  It's like looking  in the perverbial mirror saying why are you choosing to kill yourself in the end?  So once again I shall continue to write in my journal and keep going with my story.  Analyzing why I eat what I did and more on the emotions of doing so.  I do have lots of terriffic help along the way so there really is no excuses.  Besides the sooner I get going the sooner this weight will come off and the better I will feel and who wouldn't really want that?

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY BUT OOOOOOOOOH THEM DAMNED CHRISTMAS COOKIES!

Today has been a good day.  I got up at a decent hour and managed to stay awake even though I could have definately have had a nap after lunch.  Stuck to the diet pretty well today making decent choices.  Getting my water in.  Did keep busy for most of the day doing housework.  Actually I had developed at least 10 goals for myself to accomplish and I actually did (Yay me!)  Even managed to cook and eat dinner before I left for my evening job.  And at the moment there's no real work related stress that's bugging my aura.  However I do have the most wonderful co-worker.  She's sweet and baked me some Christmas goodies and left them behind in the fridge for me.  My mind is going nuts knowing that they're there.  And they smell divine.  One of the things Ali Vincent says in her book is that you should tell as many people as you can that you're on a diet/changing your life and this is one of those times when this thought is indeed a good one.  I have not been sharing too much of this with anyone.  So far I'm being good and resisting the temptation.  I'm drinking more water,  Eating my evening snacks and journalling in my food journal.  Soon I'll have to come up with 10 more goals for tomorrow.  One of them for sure will get the pedometer to work.  It kept falling off my rim of my pants and at one point reset itself for some reason so I don't have an accurate calculation of how many steps I took today.

Weight today:  242lbs (home scale)

Got a haircut and lost 50lbs!!

Ha ha ha if it was only that easy!  My hair wasn't long enough.  Not touching the floor.  Heck not even touching my butt!!  But long enough to start bugging me.  Feeling heavy.  Needing to be put into a pony tail to look somewhat decent which it wouldn't have been considering that there were a few layers that would have made things look messy.  There's a lot of work ahead for me to do so I thought I'd start by getting a great haircut and a reminder to feel good about myself.  I'd guess at least 4" strands of coloured hair hit the floor and surrounded the chair by the time things were done.  But I can see my neck now and when I put earrings in people will actually be able to see them!!  

It has been a challenge at some hair salons to get my hair cut short.  I've been to a couple of places a couple of times and put in my request.  At the last place they flat out refused and just proceeded to cut in in a one layer type of look.  The haircut did look fine by the time they were done but it truly wasn't what I had wanted.  They said that the long hair would look better on me.  But I believe that some hair dressers think that fat people should have long hair.  But with my new shorter doo I can at least give the appearance of looking more energetic and alive.  So what a great way to start!  Hopefully the energy flow will last till at least the next time I get a hair cut.  Not sure what style it will be next time as I often like to do something just different!